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A Letter to My Parents Detailing My Trip to Delphi

This is a letter written by a child to their parents about a trip they took to Delphi. The author was tasked with writing about their feelings about visiting Delphi before they went, details of the trip, how the author and the author's teacher reacted to the trip, what the author learned from the trip, and whether they would recommend that their parents should visit Delphi.
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This essay received a B by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

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This essay received a B by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

More essays like this:

Not sure what I'd do without @Kibin
- Alfredo Alvarez, student @ Miami University
Exactly what I needed.
- Jenna Kraig, student @ UCLA
Wow. Most helpful essay resource ever!
- Chris Stochs, student @ UC Berkeley

View other essays like this one:

Jenn's feedback:

"You did an excellent job hitting on all the requirements for the assignment, and in doing so, communicated the purpose of your writing and showed that you stayed focused on it. While the content of your paper is good, there are a few places that I think could benefit from some elaboration and detail. For example, what kinds of mysteries did you learn about the ancient world? Why did you have no intention of visiting another site? Why should your parents visit Delphi? The overall formatting of your letter is good. However, there is an issue with the greeting being in a different font, and I suggest not having the space between paragraphs be so large. Last, there are some grammar and sentence structure errors scattered throughout the letter, causing the letter to be less cohesive. Try reading your letter aloud and seeing if you can catch some areas where the wording could sound better. Your other option would be to have someone look over your writing and provide you with specific feedback."

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