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The Disadvantages and Risks of Using A Cellphone

This is an analytical essay in which the author goes into detail about the risks of cell phone use. They author specifically identifies the harm that can be caused by walking while looking at a phone, the detrimental physical side effects of looking at a cell phone, and the negative mental effects.
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3
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552
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This essay received a B by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

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This essay received a B by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

More essays like this:

Not sure what I'd do without @Kibin
- Alfredo Alvarez, student @ Miami University
Exactly what I needed.
- Jenna Kraig, student @ UCLA
Wow. Most helpful essay resource ever!
- Chris Stochs, student @ UC Berkeley

View other essays like this one:

Jenn's feedback:

"Your paper is off to a good start. You have clearly presented points to support your argument and have provided a substantial amount of evidence. To make your introduction stronger, consider rewording your thesis statement to include the specific risks you are going to be talking about throughout your paper. Throughout the entirety of the paper, there are a significant amount of grammatical errors that are negatively impacting the readability of your essay. The lack of citations in your third paragraph is of concern, especially since it is in stark comparison to the second paragraph. Make sure that any information that you obtained from another source is properly cited to avoid issues with plagiarism."

Learn more about this feedback