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The Montague-Capulet Feud as Main Conflict in Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet

This argumentative essay takes the position that the main conflict in Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet is the feud between the Montagues and the Capulets. The student focuses on themes of honor and loyalty, with attention to the street fights between the houses and the character of Tybalt.
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This essay received a B by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

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This essay received a B by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

More essays like this:

Not sure what I'd do without @Kibin
- Alfredo Alvarez, student @ Miami University
Exactly what I needed.
- Jenna Kraig, student @ UCLA
Wow. Most helpful essay resource ever!
- Chris Stochs, student @ UC Berkeley

View other essays like this one:

Bridget's feedback:

"This paper is off to a good start: you have the overall structure, ideas, quotations, details/evidence, and organization on the page. With all that lined up, the next step will be to start polishing up the writing (there are a number of errors and repetitions) and streamlining the argument, including giving some context for your thesis. What are the other sides of the debate? (Instead of "many people debate about...", you might try out "while some argue X is the main conflict, and others claim Y is, I would argue that the main conflict is...") Letting your reader know this in the introduction will help them understand the reason you are taking a position. Within your discussion, you will want to make sure you are not relying too much on summary. This applies to both trimming down plot details unless they are really needed for the discussion (to avoid the paragraph feeling "padded" out with description rather than analysis) and also making sure that you are analyzing your evidence and quotations and not simply reiterating the information in the quoted material (for example, the discussion of "a rose by any other name" ends up redelivering the content of the quote). You've picked some good quotations, so you will want to make sure they are doing the heavy lifting for your argument!"

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