In-text citation:
(Kibin, 2025)
Reference list entry:
Kibin. (2025). What does it take to form an ordered society?. http://www.kibin.com/essay-examples/what-does-it-take-to-form-an-ordered-society-ccQqZkUb
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Bob's feedback:
"The broad ideas about an ordered society are a great start for this essay. With some additional detail and some focus, this will be a solid essay.
Your introduction starts with a quote about making mistakes, which doesn't have an obvious connection to your thesis statement. Consider changing it to something more relevant.
The quote by Confucius that you use to demonstrate order doesn't seem particularly strong, and you admit that the ideas are outdated. Consider finding a quote that better fits your ideas.
While many of these statements about an ordered society seem reasonable, they are fairly abstract. Concrete examples of where a society has managed to achieve each of the goals you mention would go a long way toward getting your point across."
Learn more about this feedback
In-text citation:
(Kibin, 2025)
Reference list entry:
Kibin. (2025). What does it take to form an ordered society?. http://www.kibin.com/essay-examples/what-does-it-take-to-form-an-ordered-society-ccQqZkUb
In-text citation:
("What Does It Take to Form an Ordered Society?.")
Works Cited entry:
"What Does It Take to Form an Ordered Society?." Kibin, 2025, www.kibin.com/essay-examples/what-does-it-take-to-form-an-ordered-society-ccQqZkUb
Footnote:
1. "What Does It Take to Form an Ordered Society?." Kibin, 2025. http://www.kibin.com/essay-examples/what-does-it-take-to-form-an-ordered-society-ccQqZkUb.
Bibliography entry:
"What Does It Take to Form an Ordered Society?." Kibin, 2025. http://www.kibin.com/essay-examples/what-does-it-take-to-form-an-ordered-society-ccQqZkUb.
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