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Why Jack is Responsible for the Island's Downfall in Lord of the Flies

This writer argues that Jack is ultimately responsible for the island's demise in Lord of the Flies due to his recklessness and will to rule. The student cites Jack's power-hungry nature and reckless actions with regard to the other boys' safety to support their claims.
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This essay received a B by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

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This essay received a B by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

More essays like this:

Not sure what I'd do without @Kibin
- Alfredo Alvarez, student @ Miami University
Exactly what I needed.
- Jenna Kraig, student @ UCLA
Wow. Most helpful essay resource ever!
- Chris Stochs, student @ UC Berkeley

View other essays like this one:

Erin's feedback:

"Great job staying laser-focused on your main argument that Jack is responsible for the island's demise. You successfully tie each body paragraph back to your thesis and provide sufficient evidence from the novel to support your arguments. Your overall control of formatting and mechanics (grammar, spelling, punctuation) is good, too, but be mindful of indenting your paragraphs consistently and correctly.

The biggest area for improvement is your introduction. Your thesis is present, and effective, but it would be even more effective with a bit of background information that leads the reader to it naturally. For instance, you don't mention that you're writing about Lord of the Flies at all, which may be appropriate for the parameters of your assignment if your readers already know this, but it's still a good idea to set up your paper with adequate information about what you're writing about and a solid hook that grab's your reader's attention."

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